Cindie Wilding Celebrate Everyday

Hearts a' Plenty

For quite some time I have been a collector of hearts - hearts found in nature, hearts found in clouds, hearts found in a piece of fruit, cut in half, unexpectedly showing me his underbelly of love.  I'm drawn to hearts, the heart shape wherever it may unexpectedly show up.  My kids and I used to collect heart shaped rocks on hikes and vacations and I still do.  The above is a small collection housed in the downstairs bathroom window sill.  They make me smile when I find them, like buried treasure, under dirt, in sand, in the water of a puddle on the sidewalk as I run by, so insignificant you might miss them if you weren't on the look out, yet so meaningful to me on discovery.   

It's no coincidence that our universal symbol for love is a heart.  So simple in it's design (whenever I create art, it always includes at least one heart; I love it's swoopiness!), a symbol of our hearts.  And doesn't this make sense considering this is where we connect with others - not our heads so much, but our most intimate connections are made with our hearts.   

The couples that I have the pleasure of working with are also collectors of hearts.  They may not physically collect hearts (and in fact I don't think I've been told by any so far that they do) but they collect them in the ways they feel loved and express love.  I always ask my couples what their partner does that makes them feel loved.  Their answers are right in step with the way I am observant and celebratory about the rocks and images I find in the most mundane of locations.  They love the way their partner takes their hand in the grocery store, cuddles with them at night, listens to them and appreciates their goofy sense of humor.  Small little things, found objects in the every day -- hearts.    

Being a collector of hearts is not only for couples -- it's for all of us whoever we are and wherever we are.  We collect hearts when we connect with others.  This Valentine's Day, look for the hearts in your everyday life -- Do a favor for a co-worker, hug your kids, complement someone, see how friendly you can be to everyone you meet.  What hearts do you find?

A very happy Valentine's Day, from me to you.  May you express and feel love with many today and everyday.  

♥

Foodie Penpals

Because  1) I read a lot on the internet, including lots of interesting blogs by lots of intreresting people, and 2) I love different (some say weird) yummy food, I joined a Foodie Penpal group last month.  At the time I joined, I didn't realize that most if not all of the other penpals in this group were food bloggers, people whose blogs are full of recipes and information about food.  My blog is about Celebration - ceremonies, weddings, memorials and birthdays.  But then I thought - but food is a big part of celebrations and it's certainly a big part of my life!  So, I took the culinary plunge.  

Upon joining, I was hooked up with a Someone to send a package of yummies to (Frieda at Purple Oven Mitt), as well as another Someone who sent me a package of yummies (Abby at Abz 'n' Oats).  Frieda lives in Washington and Abby in Nebraska.  Already I had made two friends in different parts of the U.S.!

The day my package arrived in the mail it was a Celebration.  I had fun going through the box (and sampling of course) all the items in my package from far away Nebraska.  The picture above shows most of the contents of my package, sans one bag of seaweed snacks which I devoured almost immediately, so excited that Abby had sent me TWO packages of this, one of my most favorite snacks!  Abby managed to select some of my top food cravings - dark chocolate (oh my so good), the aforementioned seaweed snacks which I admit are a speciality item that not everyone loves as much as I, and because I told her I love all things coconut, a can of coconut milk.  I'm still trying to decide what to do with that.  Perhaps it will go into the making of a coco/chocolate concoction of some kind, along with the coconut flour my darling son gave me for Christmas.  

Part of the fun of doing this penpal exchange is pondering new and different foods and how to use them, as well as being introduced to two lovely food bloggers and their blogs.  By the way if you have thoughts or ideas on how to use my growing supply of coconut products, do share.  Now I'm off to celebrate with a piece of dark chocolate. 

If you are interested in joining (you can sign up for just one month, or keep re-upping every month), the hostess and creator of this delicious idea is Lindsey, who can be found at http://www.theleangreenbean.com/.  

Katie & Johnny

Katie and Johnny were lovers.  I never could stop thinking of that song (yeah I know it's Frankie not Katie but still) when I thought of these guys.  And boy was it true.  Sweet, pure lovers.  Lovers of each other.  Lovers of supporting each other as they went about the business of pursuing their dreams.  Lovers of Harry Potter.  Yes, HP fans, this was a wedding with many overtones of purple and a ceremony that referenced not only Harry Potter movie quotes but The Princess Bride as well.  I love all my couples.  I really do.  I love how easy it is to find the unique and wonderful qualities about each couple, to tell their story in a way that represents them.  Katie & Johnny = so sweet.  Tears were falling from all 3 sets of our eyes the moment Katie walked down the aisle.

Image Courtesy of Ford Family Photography

Johnny proposed to Katie at Harry Potter World, in the Three Broomsticks (where else?).  Theirs was to be a marriage that would last 120 years because one lifetime would not be enough.  

Image Courtesy of Ford Family Photography

Katie and Johnny wanted to demonstrate the blending of their two styles...their two distinct personalities into one beautiful, creative unit, so they had fun doing a sand sculputure with purple and silver sand.  This is a beautiful way to utilize colors from your wedding into a keepsake (and have fun learning to share and co-create something for your home.  (It did take a little bit of co-operation on their part.)

               

Photos Courtesy of Ford Family Photography

Working with Katie and Johnny just emphasized for me why I love this work.  It was such a joy to me to watch not only their faces, but the faces of their loved ones during the ceremony, dabbing their eyes with tissue, laughing out loud, experiencing some intense emotions which is really the point of ceremonies -- to feel the feelings we have inside, about each other, about this new person coming into our family, about the change in our young child who is now officially no longer a child.  It is a letting go and an embracing all at the same time and from my perspective, standing in my shoes, tears are very, very good.  

Image Courtesy of Ford Family Photography

Katie and Johnny...“Where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.”  

Out With The Old, In With The New

Image courtesy of Snowflakes & Snow Crystals

I love this time of year, the quiet, peaceful time between Christmas and New Years when the world seems more pensive, reflective, slowed down.  The hurried pace is gone and Christmas is a fond memory of family and friends, presents given and received, good food, good company.  This time of year feels quiet to me, like the quiet of snowfall.  I don't live in snow now, but did as a child.  I remember those fresh snow days and how quiet everything felt.  It's such a perfect time of year to allow that quiet to guide me in taking time for me, taking time to look back at one year and look forward to the next.

This weekend I'm carving out time, journal and kitty in my lap, hot beverage at my side; reflecting on the highlights from 2011 and my goals and aspirations for 2012.  

Here are a few of them:

2011 Highlights:

• met so many fun and sweet couples this year and had so much fun getting to know them, creating their unique wedding ceremonies and sharing their special wedding day with them
  
• amazing art and yoga solo retreat in Puerta Vallarta - explored my inner artist
• sweetie embraced vegetarian lifestyle (up side to heart attack/bypass surgery); I now call myself an aspiring vegan
• enjoyed the pleasure of performing my first memorial service, a complete honor. Very much looking forward to expanding this part of my business
• loved working with teens in a rite of passage program as they embraced a special time in their lives
• began my 'pre-marital coaching' program which I'm finding a real treat and an opportunity to get to know my couples even better
• several long weekend trips to Santa Barbara (with my kids), Clear Lake (winery tours with girlfriend) and Tahoe (performed 10 yr recommitment ceremony & led a workshop on Love Languages)

2012 Intentions and Aspirations

• trip to NYC for fun and frolic with dear coaching buddy friend I've not yet met
• appearance on Bliss Radio in June, being interviewed about Relationships
• more fabulous wedding ceremonies...continue to get to know my couples and tell their wonderful love story in a way that makes them say "YES!"
• continue to find ways to Give Back and Make a Difference:  Adopt a Turkey again at Thanksgiving, give to animal shelters and sanctuaries, begin working with hospice to lend support to the dying and their families
• continue to grow myself personally, spiritually, physically which means scheduled time for creativity, quiet reflection and my outdoor/run time and yoga time
• lead inspiring women's retreat April 7 ("Oh my gosh I'm over 50, what's happened to me?")
• attend Wanderlust and improve my 'bendi-ness'!
• despite how much my planning mind wants to plan, Enjoy The Present Moment

Thank you for being a part of my life in 2011.  I look forward to connecting with you in 2012.  Celebrate the tiny moments of your life.  Release what you no longer need and embrace the possibilities that await you in 2012.  Create your own New Years ritual with personal meaning.  Light a candle.  Say a prayer.  Offer gratitude.  

Happy, happy New Year!

Winter Solstice

Wednesday marks Winter Solstice, the shortest day of the year.  From here on the days slowly become longer as the darkness of winter turns to the lightness of spring.  But Winter Solstice represents much more than long nights turning to long days.  Solstice has been celebrated in various cultures around the world for thousands of years as a winter ritual.  After the dark, cold melancholy of winter, a time of forced indoor residing, Solstice is a time to celebrate that the lightness will once again return to life as we know it.  Take notice of all the many winter celebrations that involve light and candles:  Hanukkah candles, Saint Lucia's Day lights, Christmas lights and many other ancient cultures' rituals, celebrated with lights and bonfires.

For several years I led Winter Solstice retreats, an opportunity to stop and reflect on the past year and to look forward to the new year and all the opportunity it holds.  Winter Solstice is full of symbols of opposites -- black and white, light and dark, warm and cold, abundance and scarcity, life and death.  Nature herself celebrates solstice as the leaves gather strength to blossom again, critters gather strength to come out of hibernation.  

Sometimes our greatest joys follow deep sorrow and so it is with solstice -- it is a time to let go of the past and to embrace our bright and shiny futures.  

This year instead of leading a retreat, I'll be attending a Winter Solstice celebration at the Sacramento Food Co-op.  But I'll leave you with a few of the questions I've typically asked at my Solstice retreats, for your reflection.  

1.  What challenges did you face this year?  What was the gift of each one?  What are you incomplete with?

2.  What successes did you celebrate this year?  How do they make you feel today?  What values do they reflect?

3.  What have you learned about life that you would like to carry into the new year?  What would you like to let go of?

Winter is a lesson about the fine art of loss and growth.  The lesson is clear:  there is only one way out of the struggle and that is by going into its darkness, waiting for the light, and being open to new growth.  ~  Joan Chittister 

Happy Solstice everyone!  Here's to your limitless possibilities in the light of the new year!  

Image courtesy of  Stonehenge Winter Solstice

Ali & Yuri

Ali & Yuri came from completely different cultures, or so it would seem.  At their wedding, the right side of the aisle (from my perspective) mostly spoke Spanish, and those on the left side of the aisle, mostly spoke Persian.  They came together sometimes in bits of English and body language.  As different as they were, in cultural traditions and rituals, there was one common denominator, the thread that ran throughout their ceremony as a theme:  Love of family and a sweet cherishing of the love between them.  

 Their ceremony embraced both of their cultures -- the bride escorted in by her parents accompanied by a mariachi band and a Persian ceremony following mine, rich with ritual.  During part of that ceremony, a covering was placed over the bride and groom, held in place by bridesmaids, while other bridesmaids gently grated a sugar sculpture over their heads, representing a wish for them to have a sweet life.  

Reflecting their deep devotion to each other and their respect, admiration of love of their families, the ceremony I created for them covered loyalty to family, the sacredness they hold for their love and what love and marriage really meant to them.  To them, real love is working through the hard times, full of compassion and always being not only friends, but each other's cheerleaders.  
 It was an inspiring service, full of relatives who moved heaven and earth to hand bake baklava (a LOT of it, and probably the best I've ever had), almond cookies and a table full of other treats as well as an altar which sat behind me during the service, filled to the brim with symbology, each item representing a wish for the couple -- an abundant life, a sweet marriage, much luck, etc.  

This is why I love Celebrant work -- I find each person and couple's story inspiring and uplifting, each nuance of who they are so unique and in my heart I feel how empowering it is for them to stand in front of their loved ones, proclaiming their love, honoring their ancestors and say... this is who I am; this is who we are.    

The Rituals of Thanksgiving

As I write this it is Thanksgiving morning.  I've just indulged in one of my personal holiday rituals, a solo walk/run in the early morning, just before light, this year with a bit of rain sprinkling along with me.  So quiet you could hear a leaf drop, to me, this the way to start the holiday.  

The structure of Thanksgiving has changed a bit through the years.  In my opinion, every year more emphasis gets placed on launching immediately into Black Friday Christmas shopping so that I sometimes feel Thanksgiving gets marginalized in the immediate flurry towards Christmas.  I understand many of you may incorporate Black Friday shopping as a part of your Thanksgiving rituals and I honor and respect that.  

If I am to believe my gradeschool history book, the first Thanksgiving involved Pilgrims sitting down with Indians to enjoy peace and be grateful for the bounty they now enjoyed.  That, I believe, is still at the heart and soul of Thanksgiving -- food, family, friends, and of course gratitude.

What I love about Thanksgiving is it's simplicity -- it's about bonding with people you love, enjoying great food together and being mindfully thankful.  No one needs to go shopping or stress, just be.  I also love the fact that we all add our own traditions and rituals to the holiday.  A long-time vegetarian, this year I decided to start my own new tradition and I adopted a turkey.  In our family, since my kids were little, we've passed a bowl of popcorn seeds around the table, sharing our gratitude as we took a tiny seed.  Through the years, after dinner walks, casual and sometimes hilarious games of football in the park and pumpkin pie have all been a part of my day and celebration.

From a Celebrant point of view, this four day weekend is about celebrating the rich lives we all live, each with our own special rituals and spin.  With large extended families, this often means multiple celebrations and various traditions, but the message remains the same - celebrate with those you love, break bread together and reflect on your bounty.  

May your days be filled with love, good food, good laughs and your own sweet rituals, whether they are long-standing or freshly created this year.  And please share your own with me here, I'd love to hear them!  

Thank You!

If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you, it will be enough.

    ~ Meister Eckhart

Happy Thanksgiving, with Gratitude in My Heart

November is a fantastic time to focus on gratitude.  I love thinking of a specific gratitude each day of the month.  This way I can mindfully pay tribute to all aspects of my life and give thanks for all I have. 

Today I'm feeling especially thankful for all of my clients during 2011.  As my business grew from coaching and retreats to Celebrant ---creating ceremonies for birthdays, memorials and weddings, I feel so darn lucky to work with each one of the people I have been privileged to meet.  Each client and situation unique and special, but in every case, it was such an honor to be trusted to walk with you down your path, to listen to your story, and perhaps to inspire you as you have inspired me.  

Thanks to all of you reading this for your support as well.

From this place of gratitude, I've been giving lots of thought to how best to give back in a meaningful way.  I've been pondering and researching the many worthy charities and causes, and have decided on one.  I'll be donating a percentage of my business income this year to the Placer SPCA. In the end my love of animals and a desire to stay with a local charity helped me choose.  Check out their website or the Sacramento SPCA, or for more charity ideas check out Charity Navigator.

Anyone out there have any favorites you would like to share?  

Kimber and Steve

Image Courtesy of TheGoodness

What do you get when you cross two competitive, baseball playing, scrabble-loving, dog cuddling, funny people?  A very fun and uniquely personal wedding ceremony filled with tiny fun details, like Scrabble letters everywhere!  (Did I mention it was fun?)

When I met Kimber and Steve, they told me how they met playing baseball, how they traveled to Europe with their travel Scrabble and how every picture of them in Paris, in a "Where's Waldo" kind of way included the precious Scrabble board.  They were witty and kind, clearly in love, and they wanted their ceremony to reflect many funny and personal stories, be warm and unique and personal to them.  And, it was.

 Image courtesy of TheGoodness

Image Courtesy of TheGoodness

Kimber and Steve's ring ceremony included promises to not yell at the TV unless the 49ers were losing and to care if they did lose.  Their ceremony also included a sweet and tear-inspiring tribute to their families, in particular a greatly loved and missed nana, but in large part, in words and in laughs, it reflected the joy these two share together.   

Image Courtesy of TheGoodness

I really enjoyed getting to know Kimber and Steve while preparing their ceremony.  They share a wonderful sense of humor and are a very sweet couple to boot.  I wish them a lifetime of J O Y (13 points!)

 

(Special thanks to The Goodness for the fabulous photos they took at the wedding.  Geoff & Lisa are a husband and wife photograph and design duo who do amazing work.  Check them out at The Goodness)

What I Celebrated This Week

Last week ended with a trip to Santa Barbara with my daughter and grandson, to visit my son.  We celebrated family, the joy of playing on the beach, music and avocados while attending AvoFest.  This is one of my favorite pictures from the trip - my son teaching my grandson to play guitar.  I think they share a passion.

I celebrated the start of pre-marital coaching with my May 2012 wedding couple -- Liz & Sara.  We met for salads and conversation about their goals and expectations.  Coaching questions and homework will follow.  I celebrate them starting out with such honorable intentions.  

I celebrated what it means to be human and have a body that is not perfect.  After two quite unhappy days in bed, I celebrated my body's return to health and energetic capacity!!  Hallelujah!  

I celebrated becoming healthy just in the nick of time to perform a wedding scheduled for Friday afternoon.  It was a unique and special ceremony (of course!) combining Harry Potter colors (purple and charcoal gray), references and quotes and even a quote from The Princess Bride.  Pictures coming soon but it was a gorgeous wedding and I was so happy to be able to be there to share it with them.  I celebrate them and wish them well in their magicial new life.

Image courtesy of phanlop88

 

 

 

 

 

 

I celebrated the weekend with a long bike ride, including a ride through the local cemetary.  It may sound a little creepy, especially this time of year, but I really enjoy graveyards.  I find them serene but also oh so interesting with all the stories that are literally lying buried there.  Reading old headstones is fascinating, and I also enjoy finding altars created on make-shift headstones.  Here's a picture of a little girl's headstone.  She was only 3 when she passed and her loved ones have taken all her most prized toys, stickers, dolls, shoes and trinkets and created a most unique and sweet spot for her.  

I'm finishing the weekend celebrating the fall colors everywhere, baking lasagna, hitting the yoga mat and looking forward to what the new week will bring.  

What celebrations did your week include?  How are you finishing out the week?  Celebrate whatever you do from your heart.